Creepy, crawly, radioactive fun!

With Halloween approaching, it is my duty to remind you to keep the fun apace with the frightful for those movie marathons countless of us will indulge in. I can appreciate a good scare, but I need a good laugh along with it, because after all, I am The Queen Of Cheese. I need giggles. I need cheese. I need plots lifted from old black and white sci-fi thrillers that were funny mostly because they were so cornball bad. I need Eight Legged Freaks, and so do you.

We have the small, isolated town of Prosperity where the most popular jock tries to get in the pants of the lady sheriff’s hot daughter, young kids ride their bikes everywhere without much concern from their parents, local kooks collect spiders, and trucks drive through with radioactive waste. There’s also a mayor trying to revitalize the town after the mining has died by building an eyesore of a mall with the theory that people will just gravitate towards it like a moth to a flame. Reenter the long lost son of one of the mine workers who left over a girl (naturally), who is now the hot lady sheriff. We get painful attempts at him romancing her, lots of scenes with the young son trying to warn the town that spiders are coming to get them, all punctuated by the mildly delusional narrations of the town’s only apparent radio broadcaster.

The plot isn’t important, and the writers knew it. Instead they focus on the colorful characters populating the town (and soon the cocoons of one ton spiders). They also pay a lighthearted tribute to small town life against the backdrop of wonderfully CGI-ed spiders leaping through the air, skittering after their prey, lunging from trapdoors in the sand, or just lumbering through main street because they’re the big bad tarantula that can. The fact the spiders occasionally roar like a lion, mutter obscenities, and giggle fiendishly is all just icing on the cake.

Even if you’re afraid of spiders, you need to give this movie a chance. David Arquette (Scream) fits perfectly in his “lovable loser trying to win the girl of his dreams that he lost by punching out her jerk of a boyfriend back in high school and that’s why he left without a word and now has a lot of explaining to do” character. His aunt Gladys is divinely played by Eileen Ryan, right down to the cigarette habit that helps save the day. Kari Wuhrer is recovering from Sliders by playing a tough, beautiful, believably intelligent lady raising her two precocious kids single handed, while juggling her career as sheriff. Her eldest daughter is a barely recognizable Scarlett Johansson (before the bleach blond hair and what I think is some cosmetic work) who does a good job being a snotty teenager who still loves her mom, no matter how much she resents still living in this little town. Scott Terra is the little brother obsessed with sci fi movies, and who naturally no one believes because he’s a kid who’s obsessed with sci fi movies. Rounding out the main characters is Harlan, our conspiracy theory radio broadcaster, played by Doug E. Doug.

Whoever did the casting on this film did it with care and made sure the chemistry fit. This wasn’t designed to be a blockbuster, by any means (especially since it was up against Spiderman of all things), so they didn’t try to get a “name” to sell it. As a result the large cast all meshed together to form a believable community of small town folk just trying to jab a pitchfork in the belly of that spider trying to get in through the mall door.

The graphics on the spiders are a huge selling point for me, as well as the acting and the writing. Someone did a lot of research to get the variety of spiders right, and tended to the project with the love it deserves. Little things like spraying perfume at a giant spider demands that you see the mandibles frantically waving the offending scent away, or else why bother?

Eight Legged Freaks is one of my ‘go to’ movies when I need a good laugh. The fact this movie embraces the cheese and giggle factor make me love it all the more. I have pushed this on to friends and coworkers to initiate them into the world of cheese with good results. I now insist those of you who have not experienced this wonderfully cheesy movie treat yourselves now that the Halloween sales are on! For those who already know and love this movie, do as I will, and pull out your copy for a Halloween (or any time) viewing, and giggle away!

What's that in the distance?...Is that what's left of our careers?

Okay, after being absent in my oh-so-valuable reviews of all that is cheesy in the world of B-movies, I’m finally back to a level of free time which allows me to indulge in this irresistible fixation of mine. The first movie I chose to review sadly has no deep meaning for me, no grandiose karmic communication I felt had to be imparted to an unsuspecting world. Nope. It just happens to be what was in my DVR for me this weekend.

So here goes a review of MegaFault, another venture from Asylum Home Entertaiment which has a lot of potential which was allowed to all shake to the bottom while the CGI team tried to make the graphics more believable. There was a lot to work with this time in the way of the cast, including Eriq La Salle, of ER fame (as well as one of my favorite 80’s movies, Coming To America), Bruce Davison (X-men and a schnike-load of other work), Brittany Murphy (whose “girly” movies I’ve never liked, but could appreciate her fortitude in working opposite of Ashton Kutcher), and Paul Logan (who others may say isn’t a plus, but whom I loved in Komodo Vs Cobra). To the credit of the cast they all played their parts very well. Maybe too well for a movie of this limited caliber. There wasn’t any sense of fun at any point from any of the cast, except an occasional smart-ass line delivered by the background actors. I know this is a disaster movie, but it’s a very far-fetched disaster movie, and one put out by Asylum Home Entertainment. C’mon folks, I know it’s not as fun of a premise as Mega Shark Vs Giant Octopus, but roll with the punches and revel in the cheese factor!

I think the seriousness that “end of the world” movies incite is what turns me off of them. There seems to be a fear of making fun of anything, no matter how ludicrous the storyline gets. We have a man who specializes in blowing up mountains, named Boomer, and when he takes out a mountain, it causes a giant crack across North America, pretty much dividing the United States in two as it tears through the earth. The military enlist cute little Dr. Amy Lane who has no problem leaving her daughter and husband behind to go investigate the earthquakes, and then get called upon to calculate where the military should fire this secret weapon they have in space that can (wait for it….) start earthquakes! Back to the old “cure amnesia” theory of halting a crisis, whereby you simply have to start another earthquake in the right spot and the world will remember it’s real name is Alice, and she has a dog named… I mean, you’ll stop the first earthquake.

Not to be outdone, the cure then weakens the mantle. Naturally we then get a mega volcano that has to be stopped by blowing up a whole bunch of stuff, ’cause, well, they were running out of reasons why Boomer needed to keep hanging around.

There’s not much of substance along the way, but you do end up liking Amy Lane and Boomer, because they’re played by actors who know how to create empathy. Again, it’s just misplaced for a little movie like this. They’re acting like they’re going for an Oscar instead of just trying to keep their careers in forward momentum.

The special effects here are typical Asylum. Not horrible, not great, but still just bad enough to elicit a giggle. I think that’s why I keep watching Asylum’s movies, because at least half of them I can get through as a result of that cheese factor. The other half (such as The Terminators) are so bad I can’t get past the first thirty minutes, despite my stubborn, masochistic nature.

If you’re a fan of disaster flicks, you will probably enjoy Megafault. If you’re a fan of cheesy movies, you’ll be left wanting (and feeling a little sorry for Brittany Murphy and Eric La Salle).

With a title like that, you know it's gonna be cheesy!

Once in a while I just feel like a very tame movie with lots of cheesiness, even at the risk of some awfully saccharin moments. When the movie features Christopher Lloyd, to boot, I can’t resist, and willingly plop myself on the futon to waste a couple of hours on a family-style scary film.

When Good Ghouls Go Bad is based on the R.L. Stine book of the same name, which, like all of his other works, I never got around to reading when I was in the proper age demographic. It’s set in Walker Falls, Minnesota, a town which hasn’t celebrated Halloween for twenty years after the tragic death of Curtis Danko, the local outcast. The story goes that Curtis created a sculpture so frightening that only the devil himself could look upon it. It goes further to claim that a message written by the dying Curtis swore revenge upon the town if they ever celebrated another Halloween. When a local boy saw the statue, he was rendered blind for three days, so no one else dared to look upon it. They covered it up and placed it in the crypt where Curtis Danko was laid to rest.

So poor Danny Walker ends up moving to town with his father, who grew up there, so his father could fulfill his dream of reopening the chocolate factory. His grand plan involves bringing in German investors and putting on a huge Halloween festival. In a town that is too terrified to celebrate Halloween, that poses a problem, and a handy conflict point. Danny gets picked on at school, naturally, and hears the frightening tales of Curtis Danko. Only his crazy grandfather, who insists on being called Uncle Fred, provides him some much needed protection and companionship.

Uncle Fred is a big fan of Halloween, as well, so he quickly becomes the focus of the town’s rage, along with his well meaning son. Odd things begin to happen in the town, and Uncle Fred meets a sad fate. As only a family-style movie can do, this tragedy turns into a lot of slapstick comedy, and Christopher Lloyd shines.

This isn’t anything that original, but it’s a story told with such a joire de vie that it doesn’t matter. We have a bunch of precocious kids with half-heartedly stern parents, allowing them run of the town to try to bring Halloween back for themselves. There’s a very tame romance between a single mother and a single father, just enough to keep the parents watching alongside their kids. But mostly there’s a lot of slapstick, a lot of cheese, and a lot of giggle factor, especially as the ghouls and zombies start walking around town doing their thing. Our creepy monsters are done up about as well as typical Halloween decorations, which just made me laugh all the harder. Glowing LED eyes, foam skeletons propped up and jiggled around on sticks, lots of smoke and fog… You’ve seen it all at that one house every neighborhood has that goes all out for Halloween.

In the end everything works out the way it should in a perfect world, where the good guys get their just rewards, and the not-so-good guys get their comeuppance in a nice, tame way. In real life there would have been arrests and jail time, but we’ll just overlook that for the sake of a nice, tame, escape from reality.

If precocious kids just give you a headache, steer a wide path around When Good Ghouls Go Bad. However, if you’re a Christopher Lloyd fan like I am, give this a viewing and enjoy him obviously enjoying himself. There are also a ton of secondary characters that provide plenty of distraction. Obviously this is a movie you can also sit and watch with your own little ones, if you have them, but if you don’t, there’s no shame in giggling your way through an afternoon watching something a little sweet, barely scary, and so very, very cheesy.

Cheesiness & giggle factor are not welcome here.

Don’t misunderstand me. District 9 is a very well written, acted, produced, directed, CGI–ed, you-name-the-award-this-will-win-it movie. However, it is missing a key element in drama that Shakespeare understood so well: there must be a chance for the audience to take a breath so your story can be absorbed. That is done by well-timed, apropos additions of humor. Shakespeare understood pacing of this sort in his dramas. Why do so many current writers leave this out? It can be a tongue-in-cheek line. It can be a subtle visual gag. It can even be a split second of slapstick. Whatever fits. But you need it, or else you have a war-weary crowd that is just hanging in until the bitter end, and one that missed a lot of key messages you wanted to deliver in the last three quarters of your film because they were exhausted.

There is so much about this movie that is great, including the acting by the main character, Wikus Van De Merwe, played by Sharlto Copley. He produced and played a sniper in the six minute short (Alive In Joburg District 9 is based on. His role is a character study of a good man thrust into committing unconscionable acts towards his own race in hopes of saving his humanity. The “mock-umentary” style of much of the film paints a picture of a man loved by friends and family, but seen as only a commodity by his government. The aliens derisively called “prawns” are portrayed as creatures far from home, and subjugated by the “goodwill” of the humans who decided to cut into their ship and “save” them. The obvious parallels to racial issues adds to the intensity, and makes you squirm more than a little. The main alien, Christopher Johnson, and his intelligent young son were good characters to focus on. The hostility and desperation of Christopher is countered very well by the innocence of his offspring. The interaction between Christopher and Wikus is believable, and helps drag you through the relentless “this is serious, pay attention to the message” onslaught.

Despite a ton of gunfights, District 9 seemed slow to me. Even when we finally see some awesome alien technology in action, we had to wait so long for it that it’s nearly anti-climactic. Because this is really just a very intense character study, it was easy to get bogged down by the details. Without any humor whatsoever to break up the pace, I had to fight to keep paying attention. Towards the end I even got bored by the gunfights. My husband felt pummeled by this movie, too, and shares his review here.

District 9 was obviously a work of love and devotion, and it is a very well-done movie. It is just not a movie for The Queen Of Cheese. I need a little humor. I need a movie that doesn’t take everything so seriously. I need a movie that is willing to let me enjoy alien gadgets, gizmos, spaceships, robots, and other assorted fancy things. Basically, I need a movie willing to pander to me and my need for cheese and giggle factor. District 9, while very good for the kind of film it is, left me wishing someone would throw a pie, already.

Lots of action, lots of cheese, lots of fun!

If you go to see G.I. Joe: The Rise Of Cobra expecting a plot, you’re completely missing the point of a summer blockbuster like this. You’re supposed to be going for a good time, to see lots of action, cool C.G.I., and some cheesy, cheesy goodness! There’s sort of a plot here, but it’s threadbare, just enough to hang the goodies on. For The Queen Of Cheese, that was plenty for a rip roaring good time, one making me anxious for those two sequels Dennis Quaid is already lined up for.

The cast is huge, so that is a bit distracting at first, but once things get moving you’re able to stay focused on the main group. There are also a couple of cameos in pivotal roles, such as Jonathan Pryce as The President Of The United States, and Brendan Fraser as Sergeant Stone, responsible for whipping the two newest Joes into shape. Otherwise we have several character on the good and bad side to keep up with, and every single one of them was cast very well.

On the good guy side we naturally have Dennis Quaid as General Hawk, the man in charge of the Joes. He’s likable and charming, as only Dennis Quaid can be. Already on his team is Breaker, played by Saïd Taghmaoui, Heavy Duty, played by Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje, the awesome Snake Eyes, played by Ray Park, and the surprisingly not-irritating Scarlett, played by Rachel Nichols. Freshly recruited are Duke, played by Channing Tatum (who I still giggle over being in Step Up), and Ripcord, played by Marlon Wayans. This whole bunch have good chemistry together, making them a lot of fun to watch. All of the players keep their roles subdued, since an over the top performance would have just been lost in all of the over the top action and C.G.I. I was happy that the story skipped over a whole bunch of “you’re the new guy and don’t deserve to be here” crap they could have done. They hinted at it briefly, but quickly glossed it over to make them a team.

On the bad guy side we have a bunch of actors who get to have a lot of fun being bad. Christopher Eccleston (Dr. Who) plays James McCullen (and future Destro). Lee Byung-hun plays Snake Eyes’ rival, Storm Shadow, with lots of spectacular fighting as a result. Sweet little Joseph Gordon-Levitt plays the evil Cobra Commander, and does it so well I didn’t recognize him. There’s a small part played by the wondrous Arnold Vosloo as Zartan, a master of disguise. They weave his part in well, and leave it hanging wonderfully for the sequels. And because it wouldn’t be G.I. Joe without The Baroness, we have Sienna Miller playing it to the hilt. There’s an awesome fight scene between The Baroness and Scarlett which goes above and beyond the typical “we have to have a girl fight” scene.

Okay, there’s a plot in here somewhere, but I didn’t really care, since I was so distracted by the wonderful explosions and tons of great action. It centers around nanotechnology and missiles built to exploit them. Naturally they’re dangerous weapons and end up falling into the wrong hands, and then the good guys have to chase them. There’s an underwater military base, some sweet gadgets and vehicles, and lots of firepower. What more do you need, really?

Despite a lot of folks giving G.I. Joe: The Rise Of Cobra negative reviews, it still opened number one at the box office this weekend, and I think has secured the production of those two sequels. The action is intense, but I think even younger viewers won’t be overwhelmed by it, and will just be delighted at all of the eye candy in front of them.

I will be snapping this up on DVD the week it’s released, I enjoyed it that much, and will be in line opening weekend when the sequels do come out. I highly recommend giving this a viewing while it is on the big screen, and checking any high expectations for complex plots at the door. Go in expecting what I did, which is a cheesy good time with lots of giggle factor, and you will be very, very entertained!

Giggles galore!

As soon as I saw the title Mega Shark Vs Giant Octopus, I knew this movie was meant for me. I laughed my way through the wooden acting, and the frugally dispersed CGI of a cool looking Mega Shark and Giant Octopus. I even went so far as to watch the “special features”, and those were even funnier. The “outtakes” give one actor about five minutes more screen time than the two minutes he actually had, because he couldn’t get one of his three lines right. Listening to the four main actors discuss the movie is almost painful to endure. They try to talk it up, but look in their eyes. They’re dying inside as they do so. Three of the four don’t even get enough courtesy to have their interview conducted inside a nice, quiet room where you can even hear them. But that’s okay. For Debra Gibson’s segment I was too distracted by the guy working behind her who kept showing butt crack every time he bent over. The funniest extra was the short clip with the “cinematographer”, especially as he tries to get the poor camera person to help him demonstrate a cheap, but effective, technique to mimic a submarine being thrashed around.

But the special features weren’t what drew me in. It was the ridiculous plot, passable (I’m being generous) acting, and whiplash-inducing blips of CGI. C’mon, people, a giant shark takes out a passenger jet in mid-air! And attacks the Golden Gate Bridge! Show me that in the previews and you know I’m going to be salivating to watch the rest of what passes for the movie.

Sadly the previews give away the best parts, but this is such a train wreck I will be buying myself a copy when I see it cheap enough. $19.99 definitely is not cheap enough, but get down to the $7.99 range, and I’ll be reminding people about it at Xmas time.

So what’s all the hub bub about? Debra Gibson is an ocean scientist who is exploring underwater. She notices whales going nuts and crashing themselves into icebergs. This in turn knocks away enough ice for her to catch a glimpse of two prehistoric creatures locked in mortal combat, just before they come back to life and zip away into the murky depths. Giant sized incidents occur around the globe, including an attack on an oil rig, and our fun little plane munch. Governments naturally get involved, and our lovely scientist finds herself caught up in it, along with her former professor, and a forced love interest in the guise of a fellow scientist from Japan. After some lame science, an even lamer excuse for the main characters to have sex, and an even lamer resulting hypothesis about pheromones as a result of that sex, we’re off on a monster hunt.

Really, don’t bother trying to figure out the plot. It’s the same old stuff with government conspiracies, scientists saving the day, and narrow escapes thrown in. This is a low budget (comparatively) movie, and it shows in the small cast and limited sets. I’m actually pretty impressed with how much bang for their buck Asylum gets for their bad movies, and don’t mind how much they recycle things between them. I’m watching for giggle factor and cheese, and Asylum delivers at least one time out of five.

For the beleaguered cast I have to give props for at least having fun with the movie. Yes, in their little interviews they may be taking it a little too seriously, but at least that didn’t filter too much into the actual movie. There’s a lot of tongue in cheek delivery of lines, and I get the feeling that they were trying not to roll their eyes as they said most of them. Debra Gibson isn’t the best little actress in the world, but she’s definitely not as bad as some I’ve seen. She holds her own against poor bastard Lorenzo Lamas, who sounded like he really wanted them to kill off his character so he wouldn’t have to risk a sequel. Her professor, played by Sean Lawlor, is the believable mentor. The love interest, played by Vic Chao, plays his role a little too “this will get me an Oscar, right?”, but he’s still very likable, and has decent chemistry with Gibson.

All in all, Mega Shark Vs Giant Octopus is a giant waste of time. However, it’s a funny-groaningly-bad-leave-you-giggling-and-feeling-slightly-guilty-about-finding-it-so-funny, giant waste of time. And for the Queen Of Cheese, that’s good enough!

Not original, but could still be fun.

I just sat and watched the “two hour” premiere of Warehouse 13 on the ’suffering-some-kind-of-midlife-crisis-so-it-thinks-changing-the-spelling-of-it’s-name-to-remind-people-of-a-venereal-disease-is-a-good-idea’ network, SyFy (formerly known as SciFi). After thanking the gods for a DVR so we could skip the tons of commercial breaks, I think I remember enough of the pilot to form an opinion.

Warehouse 13 has a lot of potential to be a funny, entertaining show. It has a core of good actors as an anchor, from the oft peculiar Saul Rubinek as the resident Secret Service Agent, Artie Nelson, in charge of the artifacts, to the slightly creepy and mysterious head of the black ops-funded agency of the government, Mrs. Frederic, played by CCH Pounder (The Shield). Then we have our main characters, Pete Lattimer and Myka Bering, played by Eddie McClintock and Joanne Kelly, both relative unknowns, at least to me. I recognized Joanne Kelly from Solar Attack, but since I fell asleep during that movie, that’s not a ringing endorsement.

Pete and Myka are naturally polar opposites, with him being ’scattered’ yet ‘in tune’, and her having a ’scrupulous attention to detail’. They show Pete as a ladies man with a sense of humor, and Myka as a serious, no-nonsense agent, and basically portray her as something of a bitch. The writers also give stereotypical emotional baggage for our characters, from a firefighter father who died when Pete was young to a lover Myka lost on the job that she blames herself for. These revelations are sprung on us without ceremony, an obvious ploy by the writers for sympathy for their main characters. This kind of cheap trick is unnecessary, and waters down what should have been a solid pilot based on a ton of other shows that came before it. These stereotypes make the characters seem cardboard, and the splatter of melodrama that should have been slowly revealed over the next few episodes is just plain distracting. I’m hoping future episodes won’t rely on these crutches, and will focus on better stories, and letting Myka be more likable.

As for the story behind Warehouse 13, my first thought was of The Librarian series of movies, but without as much polish or humor. I heard it was also going for an X Files and Moonlighting feel, and I can see both in the strained attempts at banter between our agents, but I really hope the writers give it up and just let the characters grow on their own. Trying to recreate the magic of former successes will just kill the creativity that a show like this will desperately need to last more than one season. The first case our agents are on is at least interesting and well thought out, giving me hope that the series will find it’s pace with more interesting tales, and get comfortable in its own skin.

I try not to summarily judge a show by it’s pilot, since this is where everyone involved is throwing stuff at a wall to see what sticks. I will also try not to judge Warehouse 13 by the poor marketing choices of its host network, since that just wouldn’t be fair. I do think this is a show that can turn into something great and long lasting, but it’s going to take some magic in the form of getting network suits to back the hell off and let the writers actually write something original, let the actors get to know their characters and give them real life, and stop trying to make the show be everything to everyone. I’m tentatively giving the show a thumbs up, but that will change if lessons from this pilot aren’t learned, and learned quick.

If you missed the show, you can catch it on Hulu (and maybe get better commercials than ‘Syfy’lous’ desperate pleas for attention).

Cheesy effects and great actors. What a combo!

Meteor was plagued by all sorts of problems, mostly due to the folks behind it having grandiose dreams of a blockbuster, but not enough resources or people skills to pull it all together. Sadly for them, this was a flop back in 1979, but for the Queen Of Cheese sitting down to watch it finally in 2009, I loved it.

Meteor has all the elements that make a great B-movie disaster/science fiction flick. We have astronauts all the way out in a spaceship near Jupiter and Saturn. We get to see them converse with space command back on Earth, with absolutely no delay. Spiffy technology since there’s at least a few seconds delay just between Earth’s orbit and the ground! The acting aboard the space craft as a deadly meteor heads their way is awesome, too, especially with the cheesy lighting effects to simulate combustion. We get more questionable science as a comet zips through an asteroid belt and drags some big rocks with it, and one at least five miles wide ends up on a direct course with Earth, along with some baby meteors just big enough to cause lots and lots of damage, including destroying a ski resort, causing a tidal wave, and other general mayhem.

Even more ludicrous is the science behind how the meteor is going to be stopped. The U.S.A. and the U.S.S.R. both have secret, illegal space weapons with nuclear missiles, originally pointed at each other. The plan is to cut through some political b.s., provide some political posturing, but ultimately aim those missiles at the meteor instead, coordinate a launch that will divert the giant mass away from the planet, yet not just break it up into smaller, just as deadly pieces that will hit us anyway.

Really, it’s not the bad science or laughable attempts at a political or military drama that will keep you watching this thing. It’s the heavy, ominous music that sounds every time the meteor is seen rolling slowly, inexorably on it’s path of doom. It’s the long, drawn out sequences as the missiles are readied for launch, again with overbearing, giggle inducing music throbbing away, making sure we know this is a serious moment we should all take pride in as citizens of the Earth. Or something.

The acting of the main cast is definitely more than this film deserved. Sean Connery is the bitter scientist sucked back in to save the day. Karl Malden is his friend and liaison who does his best to stand between him and the paranoid military man played by Martin Landau. Brian Keith plays a very convincing native Russian scientist, delivering his lines in an accent that makes you forget all about that diabetes-inducing show, Family Affair. Natalie Wood is beautiful and smart as his English translator, and Sean Connery’s tepid love interest. Henry Fonda takes a brief turn at being President of the United States, naturally being more noble of character than any real politician would be under those circumstances. The tons of secondary characters are all top notch, adding alternate touches of humor and melodrama. Even some of the silent, just in the background characters are a riot, including a duo of ladies in a caved-in subway scene who are doing their nails with looks of ultimate boredom as they await rescue.

There have been lots of disaster movies before Meteor and tons after, and arguably Meteor is not well done. However, there’s a certain charm to it with it’s over the top music, above average acting, and laughable premise of how the world would be saved from a crisis like this, not to mention the overtly phallic symbolism in all those nuclear rockets (which the movie lingers on for several minutes longer than necessary to simply say it’s ‘dramatic’). It’s got the 70’s hair, the 70’s wardrobe, the 70’s attitude about politics, the military, and science, and an awkward, unrequited romance between a young Russian translator and an ‘old enough to be her grandfather’ American scientist. It all adds up for a popcorn-munching couple of hours. In the end, if the looming meteor rolling towards you doesn’t make you giggle a bit, you’re not watching this for any of the right reasons!